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Sir Clive Gets Loaded!

By Alex Waddington
(article originally written in September 1997)

We can exclusively reveal that Sir Clive Sinclair is officially COOL. The word from the street is Speccy. Well maybe not but our favourite ginger person has certainly been attracting the attention of the ‘trendy’ types in the past few months. It all seems to have started with the “My brilliant career” feature in top lads magazine Loaded.

In an interview carried out by Piers Townley, it is revealed that Clive’s first wage was between £300 and £350 a year and he cites his father as the biggest influence on his life. Clive also admits to drinking too much (he has a drinks cabinet in his office/house containing his favourite Bell’s whisky) and not working too hard. He says that he still has faith in his much-slated C5. More importantly though he claims that the rubber-keyed 48k has now become a collectors item and that in Russia they are 15 years behind because the Spectrum is still the most popular computer. Collectors item???

Considering us lot use them every day, it shows how much he knows about today’s Speccy scene doesn’t it? He must be flattered though that his inventions still have a use in today’s hi-tech society - but I guess WE all know that he was ahead of his time eh? Character-wise he says that on occasions he can have a volatile temperament and despite his age he can still pull the women - attracted to the power apparently! Its certainly not the bespoke tailoring that does it as he buys all his clothes off the peg!

Clive sees mini radios as the next step for Sinclair Research, followed by production of the next generation Zeta - an addition to a bicycle which gives it electronic power. Future projects could include a bicycle 10 times lighter than conventional bicycles which is made using “dramatic technology”. He says he would eventually like to move back into computers of the pocket variety and his beloved project - electric vehicles - still very much appeals to him.

So Loaded accepted him as one of their favourite sons. But it didn’t stop there. Oh no!

Clive became mega-trendy when he was asked to launch the Stringfellows website at a special celebrity bash at Peter Stringfellows posh London club. The event was described as thus: “Parties come, parties go, but there has been no party in the Internet world quite like the launch party for Stringfellows on the Internet.” So you see, Sir Clive is considered a top socialite who is an essential guest if you want a totally kicking party!

Stringfellows described our hero as, “the UK's favourite inventor and entrepreneur, Sir Clive Sinclair. Inventor of the ZX series of computers, and imaginative creations too numerous to list...” But Clive wasn’t just there - he was also the guest of honour! My god this, this guy’s so cool he can put out fires!

After cutting the red tape and pressing the button which sent Stringfellows out live onto the Internet, he said modestly: “I was honoured to be asked to launch the site. Especially with all these beautiful girls around..."

And beautiful girls there certainly were, with the Cabaret of Angels ensuring that a good time was had by all. Peter Stringfellow said in his speech ".. this is the first stage of my Internet presence. When someone like me, who knows nothing about computers gets involved in something like the Internet, you know things have got serious.”

So here we have Peter Stringfellow, playboy of the Western world and conquerer (for want of a better word) of hundreds of women, telling us that he knows nothing about computers. So who does he get in to help him? Sir Clive Sinclair of course; he likes a drink, knows his technical stuff but is not an anorak and he’s good with the ladies. So Clive is cool. Expect to see him presenting Top Of The Pops very soon.

In fact the only blip on the chart was when another lads magazine, Maxim, surveyed men and asked them who they didn’t want to turn into. At number 32 came Sir Clive, although why anyone wouldn’t want vast riches, nice women and celebrity friends is quite beyond me!

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